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There Goes My Life is the ninth episode of the first season of The Ranch and the ninth episode of the series overall.


Heather sets up Rooster with her sister, but Colt's afraid he'll ruin a good thing. Maggie and Beau air their dirty laundry at marriage counseling.



Heather and Colt are in the kitchen, the former making coffee. Colt asks how Heather learned how to make coffee like that, to which Heather says she used to be a Girl Scout. An annoyed Rooster comes down the stairs interrupting them; he is pissed that Colt used his towel again. Colt apologizes, explaining it was too dark in the bathroom with the power out. As they head out for the day, Colt asks if Heather would like to hang out later. Unfortunately, she can’t because she’s consoling her sister, Darlene, later after a rough breakup; her sister’s ex left right after the baby was born. After Rooster shows interest in her sister, Heather offers an alternative, that the four of them could go on a date together. Heather is inclined to believe Rooster is a good guy, but Colt begs to differ. Heather reassures him it’ll be fun before leaving.

After Heather’s departure, Colt voices his concern with Rooster deciding to date Darlene. He likes the thing going on between him and Heather, so he doesn’t want Rooster to cause problems for them. He knows his brother’s ways with girls. However, Rooster reassures him that he won’t ruin it for them, he claims he has changed his old ways with girls.

Later at night, Maggie arrives at the Ranch wanting to talk to Beau. She has booked a counseling appointment for them because she doesn't want them to get a divorce. Beau hates talking to strangers, nor does he like spending money, so he is obviously against this. Maggie reassures him that they won't have to pay and she knows a licensed therapist, Priscilla. She is an expert on marriage, according to Maggie, however, Beau is not convinced. Moreover, this is the busiest time of the year for him. Maggie says the only way she's going to move back in is if they start connecting more and she thinks seeing a therapist will help them. She even offers to buy him a burger afterwards. Instead, Beau wants steak if he's sharing his feelings. Making no promises, Maggie says they'll see how the first session goes. Beau is surprised that there'll be more than one.

At Maggie's, Colt, Rooster, Darlene, and Heather sit on their date. Rooster asks Darlene what she does for a living. While her mother watches the kids four days a week, she works at a nursing home; mostly her work involves dealing with cranky senior citizens. Rooster claims he does too. Darlene asks if they're Ranchers to which he confirms, saying Colt works on his ranch. Colt gives him an incredulous look, which he ignores. Darlene asks if he likes working as a Rancher, but he asks in return if Jesus liked being a carpenter. Confused by his reply, Rooster explains to Darlene that he didn't choose it, it chose him. Being a rancher is tough, you've got to be strong, muscular, but also sensitive and gentle, with real caring touch, Rooster elaborates. Suddenly, Darlene gets angry while looking at her phone. She explains that her ex just posted a picture with him and his new girlfriend. Heather tells her to forget about him, they're having a good time together. They fail to calm her down, as she storms off, her sister trailing behind her. She seems stable, Colt remarks sarcastically.

Colt goes up to order more beer for them, where he unexpectedly meets Abby. She asks what all the yelling coming from his table is, to which he replies that it's Rooster on a blind date.



Guest Starring[]


  • Elizabeth Tatus as Hostess


Beau: "How is that you two are so tired at the end of every day, but you still muster enough energy to out drinking every night?"
Rooster: "'Cause it ain't work when you're doing something you love."
―Beay to Rooster about his nightly visits to the bar.


  • Bodeans - "Waste a Lifetime"
  • Desi and Cody - "Unfamiliar Road"
  • Lanco - "American Love Story"
Scene: Closing credits.